Sunday, January 4, 2009

Have a little soup

It's been a while since I've felt like writing in this very personal mode. I've been focusing on my photography blog and education blog. But it seems like the time is right to start again.

It has been a year now since Keith got out of surgery -- and that year has had some very anxious moments. Each time there is a scan there is worry attached. We have had some big arguments regarding his eating at times. I just want to smack him "upside the head" when he says things like he'd rather die than spend the rest of his life eating soup. I know what he really means -- that he wants to live a normal life. I understand that. But so does everyone. But were not talking about a vegetative existence here. We're talking about eating certain foods. I know Keith has always been a meat and potatoes kind of guy (especially when the meat is a big steak). So now he can still be a meat and potatoes kind of guy, only with hamburger. And I make great soups too, by the way.

Altering life-long habits are really difficult -- but missing out on some of these small enjoyments are not worth dying for. If eating soup is what is required in order to hold your new granddaughter Emily when she is born in January, then I say "waiter, soup please!"

Life is worth living until the very last moment possible. To hold a child, share a thought, listen to music, watch a good movie, write an idea down, talk in the early morning hours, watch a sunset, and a million other moments. All these things are what life is all about.

Keith has worked hard to overcome cancer -- now it is time to overcome the need to be "normal." For what is normal anyway? Human beings survive and thrive in spite of great physical and personal obstacles. Cancer is only one of them. It is time to look at what we have, rather than what we don't have. Keith -- you can see, hear, feel, smell, and taste. The five great gifts from God. You have a family that loves you. You have friends who care about you. You have the respect of your colleagues. You are able to work and play. You have a home. You have a life that is meaningful. You have helped others in this life. You have experienced great joy and great sorrow -- and will continue to do so. Your life is a part of many other lives. We have a lot to look forward to in the future -- our family is still growing and changing. We have more young men to add to our "sons," and we have more grandchildren to enjoy. We have new siblings to build relationships with. We have aging aunts and uncles to cherish. Our own parents are gone now, and that means that our family now relies on us to take up their mantle of love and support.

So I say, "soup please!" It's a small price to pay for the joy that this life brings.